Words are easy ways to express your thoughts, opinions, judgments and beliefs but you must appreciate words are, therefore, powerful. God created us by His words. Satan deceived us by words and Jesus came on earth to save us with His words. Words are, therefore, powerful. They are like arrows that when thrown cannot be taken back.
Words also have the psychic energy to perform just what you want them to. They produce negative or positive ripple effects on your partner and return to you in multiplied forms. Whether good or bad, your words dominate your life and relationship. They stir up victory or defeat. Your words can make or unmake you, your words can either build or destroy your marriage or relationship.
You are a reflection of your words and your relationship is, therefore, a reflection of your words. Numbers 14:28 and Proverbs 18:21 lays a great emphasis on the words that we speak for they can either bring life or death to us.
Positive words
Words of appreciation, gratitude, and kindness generate warmth in your lover and he or she will react to you kindly. Simple words like ‘I love you, thank you, I am glad I have you, sorry, you make me happy and thank you” are simple but effective ways to touch your lover’s heart because it makes him or her feel cherished wanted and loved. In difficult times your words of encouragement and hope will lift your relationship from prison to paradise.
Many years ago, a man took his wife to her hometown to dissolve the marriage. At the meeting, he listed many bad things she had done. The woman knew they were not true but she did not offer any defence. She simply knelt down and told the gathering the man had been so good to her that she could never make it without him. She begged for forgiveness and flavoured it with tears. Everybody was touched and the man forgave her.
Negative words
Negative words like ‘you are hopeless, my former lover was better, I regret marrying you” are internalised and not processed easily. They create emotional pain, anger and bitterness. They generate criticism, arguments, hostility and manipulation. They will affect what you command. Many relationships have been destroyed by a poor choice of words.
There is this man who looking at who and what he is must do very well in life. Everything about him appears to fail. After some counselling, it became obvious that he was a troublesome child and his mother used to tell him ‘daakye na wo behu’ or you will suffer in future. They were simple words but has done a great harm to this man.
Men must know that words have a great impact on women. They are magnified many times in a woman’s brain. They are stimulated and aroused by positive, soft and loving words. Simple words like ‘ I love you ‘ melt her heart. On the other hand, painful words like ‘are you a woman ?‘ Destroy her feminine images and her self-esteem. Many times men hurt their women more than they think. A man may ask why a woman should shed tears over a ‘small’ comment. What appears simple words to a man can cause a great damage to a woman.
Keep talking to your spouse
Talking is the foundation of a fulfilling relationship you must, therefore, keep talking to your lover to exchange your feelings, share information, learn more about each other and build each other up. You must, therefore, keep talking. There is no better place to express and share your life than the words you share in your relationship. You are the most important voice your partner hears.
Your words will stir up defeat or victory in your relationship. Make time just to talk with your lover but choose your words of affirmation, encouragement, motivation, love, acceptance, appreciation, comfort and hope. Spice your conversation with words of truth, purity and love. Let no unwholesome words come out of your mouth but only such as good as edifying. With your tongue, you can build or destroy your relationship. Speak wisely to nurture your relationship.
