Whether we like it or not, social media has become an inseparable part of modern life. It connects people across distances, brings communities together, and makes the world feel smaller than ever before. However, like many powerful tools, it presents both benefits and challenges. A common saying reminds us that the very thing we love can also be the thing that harms us.
Social media has undoubtedly changed how we communicate, but it has also altered how we handle conflict. For many, it consumes money through constant data use, takes away valuable time, and often keeps people awake late into the night. More concerning is its role as a public courtroom, where misunderstandings, personal disputes, and grievances are quickly displayed for public judgment.
Increasingly, people use social media to settle personal scores, expose one another, or respond to disagreements without considering the dignity, privacy, or hard-earned reputation of the other person. It has also become a space where threats are made and relationships are damaged, sometimes involving people we once called close: family members, friends, spouses, colleagues, and community members.
A glance at conversations on politics, religion, organisations, and social groups shows how public platforms have increasingly become battlegrounds for conflict rather than spaces for dialogue. In the past, disputes were often resolved privately, with parents, elders, chiefs, religious leaders, senior siblings, and respected community figures quietly mediating disagreements. Many of the issues that now erupt online would once have been handled discreetly, with restraint and guidance. Today, however, even minor misunderstandings can quickly escalate into public posts. In moments of anger, people often turn to social media, presenting only one side of the story in search of sympathy or public support.
This raises important questions:
1. Does taking every disagreement to social media resolve the issue, or does it make it worse?
2. Beyond the temporary satisfaction of public approval, does exposing another person truly bring peace?
3. In moments of anger, do we forget that the person who offended us is still human?
4. If asked to choose between holding onto anger and preserving a relationship, which would we choose?
5. If we are comfortable exposing others publicly, are we prepared to accept the same treatment when we make mistakes?
Often, the desire to “win” a public argument may satisfy the ego for a moment, but it can leave lasting regret. In many cases, the damage done to trust, dignity, and relationships cannot easily be repaired. Freedom of expression is important, but it must be exercised with responsibility. As much as people seek truth, justice, and fairness, these should be pursued with prudence. Prudence does not deny justice; rather, it ensures justice is pursued without causing unnecessary harm.
There are times when people feel justified in striking back, especially when they believe they have been wronged. Yet not every battle belongs in the public eye. Patience, restraint, and wisdom often accomplish more than a quick reaction. We may be tempted to wound those who offend us—whether a spouse, sibling, friend, colleague, or partner—but conflict handled without wisdom deepens scars instead of healing them.
While some fight to destroy reputations, true justice seeks restoration. One enduring consequence of this culture of public confrontation is the example it sets for the next generation. Children are watching. They notice how adults respond to anger, disappointment, and conflict. If public humiliation becomes the accepted way of settling disputes, they may grow to repeat the same patterns—not only with peers, but eventually even with parents and elders. What feels satisfying today may shape behaviours we regret tomorrow. The values we display in public become lessons for those who follow after us.
For many, social media has become more than a tool; it has become part of daily existence. Some struggle to know when to use it, where to use it, and when to stop. For others, being offline even briefly can feel unsettling. Social media is much like a knife. In the right hands, it serves a useful purpose. In careless hands, it can cause deep harm. The question, then, is not whether social media is good or bad. The real question is whether we are using it wisely or allowing it to use us.
By Nicholas Nibetol Aazine, SVD
Coordinator for Justice, Peace and Integrity of Creation (JPIC)
Society of the Divine Word missionaries (SVD)
Ghana-Liberia Province
A Catholic, Missionary and Religious Congregation
