Many individuals in their reproductive years desire to have children naturally. However, some face challenges when trying to conceive. After speaking with several women in this situation, I noticed the following: out of ten women, five were unfamiliar with the concept of ovulation, three understood what ovulation was but were unaware of when it occurred, and only two were knowledgeable about both ovulation and their ovulation periods.
When I asked about their reasons for engaging in sexual activity, it became clear that their primary goal was to become pregnant. Psychologically, this mindset can hinder the conception process. I began working with three of these women using natural remedies, encouraging them to approach sex with a focus on enjoyment rather than solely on the goal of conceiving.
Following a series of medical and gynaecological examinations, it was confirmed that these women were both medically and gynaecologically healthy. All three had been trying to conceive for five years. I guided them through understanding their menstrual cycles, educated them on recognising the signs of ovulation, and emphasised the importance of enjoying intimate moments together without the pressure of conception. To our delight, they were able to conceive. While many factors contributing to difficulty in conceiving are known, some remain unexplained. This is a gynaecological issue that affects certain women.
Understanding Infertility
Infertility is the inability to conceive after one year of regular, unprotected sexual intercourse for women under 35, and a period of six months for women over 35. Based on the outcome of sex education I mostly share with couples, and my experience, regular unprotected sex means having sex 3–4 times a week. Unplanned intercourse does magic sometimes.
In most cases, women are blamed for the issue of infertility, but the truth is that some of the causes of infertility are from the men. Due to these reasons, some women go to various hospitals, take prescribed and unprescribed medications, and also resort to spiritual interventions and all sorts of concoctions just to conceive—affecting them both physically and psychologically.
Some Causes of Infertility (in females):
- Irregular menstrual cycle
- Damage or blockage to the fallopian tubes
- Endometriosis
- Hormonal imbalance
- Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)
- Uterine issues such as fibroids and other structural abnormalities
- Quality and quantity of eggs
- Some medical conditions e.g., diabetes
Some Causes (in males):
- Low sperm count
- Abnormal sperm motility or movement
- Hormonal imbalance
- Abnormal structure of the sperm
- Absence of sperm in the ejaculate (Azoospermia)
- Erectile dysfunction
These causes may result from medical conditions such as diabetes; infections like STIs, mumps, etc.; and the use of illicit drugs such as heroin, cocaine, and smoking.
Types of Infertility
- Primary Infertility: When a woman has never been pregnant despite regular sexual intercourse
- Secondary Infertility: When a woman cannot get pregnant after one successful pregnancy
- Unexplained Infertility: When medical or obstetrical investigations give no reason for the inability to conceive
Shared Responsibility
In our communities, we hardly point fingers at the males regarding infertility; women usually carry the cross. What is unknown is that a man can ejaculate, but not all sperm can grab an egg and fertilise it; interestingly, some do not even have an erection. To ensure a concrete diagnosis of infertility, a series of lab investigations must be carried out on both the man and the woman.
This is the point where most men refuse to come to the hospital for lab investigations and examination—until an investigation is done on the woman, which shows that she is fit to conceive. Even at this stage, some men still do not show up for medical investigation.
We find ourselves in a society where women are expected to conceive right after marriage, irrespective of the couple’s plans. If pregnancy does not result within a few months, the questions, gossip, and pressure from family and friends alone affect the couple psychologically—and their aim for having sex becomes solely pregnancy, which does not help the process.
I encourage young women not to ignore menstrual abnormalities or reproductive issues. Rather, they should seek help, even when they are not ready for kids. Men, kindly support your spouse and be ready to go through the necessary medical examinations required during the treatment process.
The Writer is:
Recheal Hesse Matey
