Life today is challenging for many people around the world. The complexities of marriage have led numerous individuals to view it as an undesirable option. As a result, single life is becoming increasingly popular across various social groups. In fact, the global proportion of individuals living single lives has doubled over the past 20 years. This trend is particularly concerning in Ghana, where marriage is traditionally regarded as a sacred duty and a central focus of life.
Why single life?
Many remain single for reasons beyond their control. The rising cost of living makes marriage rites, housing, and family responsibilities difficult to afford. Others choose singleness out of convenience, prioritising careers and financial gain above marriage. Some carry scars from painful relationships and fear repeating past failures. For a few, it is rooted in self‑interest—they guard their wealth and resist sharing what they have worked hard to earn.
There are those with innate struggles, feeling trapped in identities that draw them toward same‑sex love. Others wrestle with emotional challenges that diminish their desire for intimacy or make it difficult to connect with the opposite sex. Some insist they cannot find suitable partners, setting rigid conditions and being overly selective. At the heart of it, many simply lack a clear understanding of what marriage truly means.
Why does single life appear good
You have freedom and independence. You need not make mutual decisions or put up with behaviours you find unacceptable. You can, therefore, stabilise your emotions. You have the opportunity to utilise your talents and skills fully. This may explain why most very successful women are single. Today, people claim they can get sex, children, domestic care, financial support and everything marriage offers without marrying. If they can get free milk, they will not buy a cow and worry about its maintenance.
Why is single life bad?
Single life often carries the burden of loneliness. Indeed, the only aspect of creation God declared “not good” was man’s isolation. It is therefore clear that it is not good for a person to live alone. Men and women are designed to complement one another—each bringing unique strengths that enrich life when shared. A man is called to use his abilities to support and protect a woman, while a woman brings her gifts to strengthen and uplift a man. True completeness and self‑sufficiency, apart from this partnership, remain an illusion.
Singleness also deprives one of emotional support. The assurance of being “one flesh” with another provides profound mental stability. By contrast, single life often weakens commitment and fosters self‑centeredness. Socially, it carries a negative image. In Ghana, adulthood is closely tied to marriage, and those who remain unmarried are frequently judged as irresponsible or undeserving of recognition. The Akan term “Sugya ni”—literally, “a man who fetches firewood for cooking”—reflects this perception. Since cooking is traditionally reserved for women, the bachelor is seen as lacking respect and social standing.
What to do
If you are single, desire to marry. Nothing will come to you except what you put in your mind. Fortunately, there has never been a lack of relationships and studies show that people can find partners more easily than they think. Love yourself and have self-confidence. Go out very often and do everything with passion. Love all who come to you and smile to let people know you are easy to get along. Don’t cling to yourself or act desperate. Don’t look for love. Love will find you as you live your life to the fullest.
If you are married, make every effort to stay married. Remember that every marriage has its moments of difficulty. The fact that you have problems does not mean there is something wrong with your marriage. You are only being human. Angels don’t marry; it is, therefore, impossible to have a trouble-free marriage. You only need to keep working on your marriage to make it work. Never make divorce an option. It has never been a solution but a problem. Every marriage can be restored.
Single life can never be fashionable. Human beings were made for relationships. God has made marriage a permanent feature of all human society because of its amazing benefits. Married couples are emotionally and physically healthier. They live longer and have higher levels of happiness. Married couples have greater wealth because sharing creates wealth. It’s God’s desire that you marry, except when you dedicate yourself in a special way to serve God and humanity. Never stay out of marriage out of resentment, fear, selfishness and inordinate ambition. A man will always need a woman.
A woman will always need a man. Two are always better than one. God says he who finds a wife finds a good thing and receives favour from Him. God says it is not good to be alone. Believe Him. So say no to single life. It is only marriage that will give true love, a stronger family and a happy nation.
E-mail: jydbookye@yahoo.com
Tel: 0208181861
