You don’t feel in sync with your partner
You may have found the “ideal” partner as per the societal checklist of things to look for in a spouse, but despite the outwardly ‘match made in heaven’ vibes, you feel completely out of sync with your partner. As a result, you find yourself compromising your ideals to fit your partner’s worldview. This is a sign you may be engaged but not ready for marriage. At least, not with your present partner.
You are focused on your career
Your family and friends may think you’re ready to settle down because you have a decent job and a stable career, but for you, the prime focus is your professional growth. You’ve thrown yourself in work completely. You are the first to reach the office, the last to leave and weekends have no meaning for you. Your single-minded focus is on meeting that next career milestone.
You’re not over your past
So, there was that one person in your past you were head over heels in love with and saw a future together, but unfortunately, things didn’t pan out as expected. If the hurt from that heartbreak still keeps you up at night, it is one of the signs not ready for marriage.
Marriage is an item on your to-do list
You may have a long-term partner but you’re with them more for practical reasons than out of love. When you are torn between ‘not sure if I want to get married’ and ‘it has to be done, might as well get it over with’, you’re considering this life-long commitment for all the wrong reasons and that means you’re not ready for marriage.
You rushed into saying yes
You found someone who swept you off your feet and things progressed rather quickly. They popped the question and in the heady rush of romance, you said yes. But you both don’t know much about each other – your quirks, annoying habits, flaws, fears and apprehension still remain an enigma. You may be engaged but not ready for marriage.
You’re doing it to get back at an ex
You went through a breakup recently and somehow figured that getting married will be the best way to let your ex know that you’re over them. This is the most twisted way of getting back at someone for breaking your heart, and you risk jeopardising two – if not three – lives in the process. Besides, the person you plan on getting married to will suffer the consequences of your choices for no fault of theirs. If you remain hungover with your ex, you’ll never be true to your marriage.
Parental pressure
As our expert mentioned, pressure from parents and family is one of the top reasons why people give in and say yes even when they’re not ready for marriage. Nobody likes the constant collective nagging about the unimaginable sorrow of an unmarried person’s lie and how marriage is the solution to all your problems.
But for sake of your own happiness, turn a deaf ear to persistent pestering. Do not get married because your parents or your relatives or neighbours want you to or because your social media feeds is full of people posting wedding updates.
You don’t believe in the institution of marriage
You feel strongly that marriage is an outdated, restrictive institution and aren’t a believer in the concept of monogamy, then not ready for marriage and perhaps never will be. Unless you find yourself a partner who shares your worldview and is onboard with the idea of marriage as a mean of seeking companionship without sacrificing one’s sexual liberties, you should probably steer clear of tying the knot altogether.
You keep secrets from your partner
Everyone has a bone or two in their closet that they’d rather keep hidden, even from their partners. But if your relationship rests on a skeleton of untold truths and brazen lies, it is one of the alarming signs you’re not ready for marriage.
If you are not comfortable sharing the not-so-pleasant details from your past or present with your partner, a lifelong promise does not bode well for your future. Either try to get to the root of the problem and sort this out or take a step back from your decision to marry this person.
You have cold feed
The idea of marriage is freaking you out. No matter how much you try to reassure yourself that it’s going to be okay, you cannot bring yourself to come to terms with waking up next to the same person the rest of your life, getting caught in the monotony of matrimony and raising children in the future. You’re definitely not ready for marriage. It’s best to pull the plug now than be miserable for the rest of your life or deal with the mess of a divorce.
