For many of us, childhood was marked by an eager impatience to grow up. We longed for the freedom to braid our own hair or wear wigs without seeking permission, to step out without constant parental oversight, and to make choices without having to justify them. From afar, adulthood seemed like pure liberation—complete control over our lives and the promise of becoming whatever we aspired to be: a doctor, a teacher, a banker, or simply “wealthy” once we turned 18. That anticipation only grew stronger as we entered senior high school.
Parents became more attentive, ensuring our daily needs—food, money, and care—were met, though we rarely grasped the effort behind it. And when they denied our requests, we often felt frustrated or let down, not realising that those refusals were sometimes sacrifices masked as discipline
Wrapped in the comfort of childhood, adulthood appeared glamorous, effortless, and irresistibly appealing. Yet, as we step into our early twenties and leave the shelter of home, the illusion quickly unravels. Allowances give way to bills, routines are replaced by responsibilities, and freedom carries a price no one prepared us for. What once seemed like a carefree paradise reveals itself as a demanding stage of life—laden with pressures we were too young to recognise and realities that arrive without hesitation. Freedom, once imagined as light and boundless, now comes weighted with accountability, consequences, and a gravity we never anticipated.
Henry Kwakye, a 24-year-old who recently moved into his first apartment after university, recounts the shock vividly:
“I was not given the true picture of what adulthood is like or should be like. As a matter of fact, many of my coequals are refusing to accept that we are adults now. It is because nobody really prepared us for the realities that come with being an adult. You are now responsible for your own bills, lifestyle, and choices, among others.
These are things that a few years ago were being done on your behalf. Statistically, it has been proven that even though we earn more than our parents did when they were like us, they were better off than we are now. I find this very worrying. So, when asked if adulthood is a scam, I am quick to align and say yes.”
Another, Johnson Koomson, also shared a similar experience: “Yes! Adulthood is a scam. You’re told it comes with freedom and independence, but you’re then caught up in bills, responsibilities, and stress. There’s no manual to follow to make it better; it’s either you strive to overcome them or relax for them to drown you down.”
Roger Asimah added bluntly: “Don’t get me started on adulthood because time no dey. There must be a law that permits other adults to adopt adults.”
Moses Addai offered a contrasting view: “Okay, so I don’t think adulthood is a scam. It’s just that most people, or most of us, aren’t adequately prepared for it. And there’s no formula for getting it right. Everyone is doing try and error because what would work for someone might not work for another person. So it usually feels like we’ve been scammed because it’s not all we thought.”
Conclusion
These perspectives are valid. For me, adulthood is not a scam, but rather a phase shaped by the gap between childhood expectations and lived reality. As children, we imagine freedom, success, and independence in ways that rarely account for the complexities of adult life. The responsibilities, challenges, and pressures that come with growing up often collide with those idealised visions, leaving many of us feeling unprepared.
Adulthood is less about fulfilling childhood fantasies and more about confronting reality, adjusting expectations, and finding meaning in the choices and responsibilities that define us. Ultimately, adulthood may differ from what we once envisioned, but it becomes what we choose to make of it.
Source: Patricia Boakye
