Lawyer and relationship counselor, Serwaah Sarfo Mensah, has advised women to heal from past trauma before entering romantic relationships. Speaking on JoyPrime’s Let’s Talk on Tuesday night, she emphasized that unresolved trauma can impact choices, self-worth, and the ability to thrive in relationships. “As a woman, you need to heal from your emotional trauma before seeking a relationship,” she stated.
Her comments followed a discussion about a woman who experienced maltreatment from a relative. Although she later found love, she is now in debt after her partner began struggling with mental health challenges. Serwaah explained that if emotional trauma is not addressed, it can resurface later in harmful ways.
She encouraged women to build their self-esteem independently, stressing that a desire for emotional support does not indicate weakness. “We shouldn’t think we are not strong just because we sometimes seek emotional support from people or our partners,” she noted.
She encouraged women to focus on personal growth and healing as the foundation for their future relationships. Touching on the importance of family guidance, she referenced an Akan proverb: “What adults see, we don’t see.” She explained that elders sometimes notice red flags in relationships that younger people in love may overlook.
Referring to a woman’s strict upbringing under her aunt, Serwaah suggested that this treatment could have been a form of protection. “Because her aunt didn’t have children, she might have disciplined her that way to safeguard her,” she said, urging viewers to recognize the protective instincts behind what may seem like harsh parenting.
She also cautioned women not to compromise their dignity in exchange for kindness. “You don’t need to sacrifice your dignity to appreciate someone’s kindness,” she advised.
Esq. Serwaah also underscored the need for self-reliance. “You are on your own. Do things for yourself so people around can help you out, but you have to support yourself first,” she said, adding that inner strength fosters emotional and mental well-being.
In her closing words, she encouraged the woman to focus her love on her child. “Pour all your love into your child. Make sure she doesn’t go through the same thing you went through,” she urged.
She encouraged the woman to temporarily step back from her relationship, focus on healing, confront the sources of her emotional pain, and cultivate self-love. Only after this process, she noted, should a decision be made on whether to rekindle the relationship or move forward.
Let’s Talk, which airs every Tuesday at 9 p.m. on JoyPrime, continues to serve as a space for authentic stories and insightful discussions on relationships. The programme has also launched a new segment, Love Web, designed to connect individuals in search of love. Viewers interested in participating are invited to share their details with the producers.
Source: Lois Ampea-Badu
