Some young ladies say Christian men are ‘boring’ hence they would prefer to tie the knot with adventurous guys. The main reason for this, the ladies say is because marriage was too long a journey to live with someone who is not audacious. Unfortunately, these ladies might have to rethink their decision since they would have to battle infidelity after marriage.
This is because a relationship enthusiast, Kobina Ata-Bedu, and a marriage counsellor, Rev Kofi Boateng speaking on Home Affair on JoyFM said, a man can only be faithful to a woman if he fears the Lord. Whilst contributing to the topic “why I let her in even though I am happily married,” Mr Ata-Bedu explained that only Christ in a man’s heart could make him commit to his wife.
“The main reason why ordinarily, a man will be able to stay loyal to a woman is the Christ factor. If you go through the Bible days before Christ was born and during when he was on earth, the culture at the time was polygamy,” he said on June 10.
He explained that this is evident even in the animal kingdom since male species usually go after multiple females, thus “the wiring is such that a man can always have multiple. The issue of sticking to one person has been cultural and contextual.”
Again, the relationship enthusiast added that the African culture has always permitted men to have more than one wife thereby enabling more men to continue on that tangent. “In our African communities, it has been cultural for a man to have multiple wives, so it is in his DNA. It is the West and the English who have the culture of monogamy,” he told host, Edem Knight-Tay.
Rev Boateng, the marriage counsellor who shared a similar view added that the African culture makes men believe that it is okay for them to have a wife and still have concubines on the side.
“Some people generally feel empowered because they live in the culture of polygamy, where everybody they know has a side chick or married to another person or is with another person whether lawfully or unlawfully and so they feel empowered. It’s normal, the ‘everybody is doing it syndrome’ so they do not consider it sinful,” he said.
Again, the counsellor said some men cannot resist women, and so, the slightest pressure from a woman makes them fall. “Not everybody can flee as we are admonished in the Bible. Not everybody can say no to the adulterous woman that proverbs describe, so they get into temptation they are unable to say no.
“Some people are just yes men. They comply with everything that you throw at them, they will take it. So when a woman throws themselves at them, they don’t have the will to say no and they just fall for it,” he added.